The Anxious Child
by
David C. Mathis, Ed.D.
Anxiety is a normal part of life. Some children tend to be more anxious than others but all children experience anxiety at times. Anxiety in children is expected at certain times of development. For example, even healthy children, from approximately age seven months through the preschool years, may show intense distress (anxiety) when separated from the their parents. Children may also have episodes of developing specific fears about various activities, events and occurrences. Much of this is normal and will soon pass. However, when anxiety becomes severe it begins to interfere with normal activities. For instance, children may have trouble separating from parents, attending social events, making friends, attending school or trying new events. Many of the activities may end up being endured with a great deal of anxiety or even avoided.
Severe separation anxiety may be seen in the following ways:
* frequent headaches, stomachaches or other physical complaints
* clingy, dependent behavior
* excessive worrying about things before they happen
* unable to sleep away from home
* refusal to attend school or wanting to leave early
* fears about safety for self and parents
* severe anxiety/panic attacks where separated from parents
If children are showing these reactions, parents should consider seeking an assessment from a psychologist or other mental health counselor. Many anxious children tend to be quiet, eager to please and cooperative. Thus, their problems may be overlooked. As a result, problems may become ingrained and more difficult to change. Early consultation with a counselor may help ward off difficulties, such as, loss of friendships, low self-esteem, and failure to achieve potential in social and academic areas. In addition, since anxiety tends to be a chronic problem, early intervention can help prevent the problems from becoming excessive.
Parents may often plant the seeds for anxiety by being over-protective. In helping their children, they may also be having to facing some of their own fears and anxieties. Believe that your child can and will learn to face the situation or event that he or she is anxious about. That belief will become a source of confidence for your child to continue. The success in facing his or her anxiety will ultimately lead to self-confidence.